true hope: When Everything Falls Apart

my story

Seven years ago was the happiest time of my life.  Work was filled with purpose. I was seeing people encouraged through volunteer ministry at church.  The people I loved were healthy and happy. But then, everything changed. All of a sudden came a series of losses. Painful beyond words.

Peoples’ reactions to the losses in my life were varied. There were those who reached out in care, wanting to help, but not knowing what to do.  I appreciated their kindness in those moments.  There were also those whose reactions were more harsh.  ‘She must have done something to cause this!’.  Over the past 7 years I’ve heard everything from, the reason for my losses was because of ‘generational curses’ to what could only be described as a rejected version of Kpop Demon Hunters, without the award winning soundtrack.  

When I took a step back from the hurtfulness of their comments, I realized that hidden under the whispers and wonderings, might be a deeper, more human question.   Coupled with a very human fear:  I seemed like a ‘good person’, so how could so much tragedy come into my life so quickly?  I was told if someone could point to a reason all of the loss was my fault, it would make them feel safer that nothing this bad could happen to them.  The insults and accusations may not have been coming so much from a place of meanness as they were coming from a place of fear.  No one wants to go through hard things.  I can relate.  From my own personal experience,  I can share that going through hard things is, well…hard.

The false belief that bad things happen because of the bad things done by someone is a really common misunderstanding of what the Bible teaches about suffering. It’s a remix of what’s commonly called ‘the prosperity gospel’.  The logic behind the accusation was something like this:

‘If she was a good person, then God would have blessed her with … but, if she instead had an unexpected loss…that must mean she sinned.’  

This is not what the Bible teaches about suffering.   It’s a vast oversimplification, like trying to solve a calculus problem by counting on your fingers (good deeds + God = happiness!). It’s very superstitious. And as a well known poet once wrote, ‘superstition ain’t the way.’ 

Superstitions and wishful thinking can create a type of false hope for some people.  They believe if they do the right things, they will have a happy life.  Disney princess approved!  All is right in the world! Happily ever after. The problem with that type of wishful thinking is that when the storms of life roll through, it fails. When the storm is howling outside of your door, wishes won’t work. When the storm comes, there is a really big difference between wishful thinking and true hope.  

Building our lives on Jesus, the Solid Rock,  leaves us in a much better position to withstand the storms of life.

That’s why I decided to start this site.  For the past 20+ years, I’ve worked to encourage people in their faith- especially as they walked through their own storms.   What I’ve found is that more than anything else, it’s God’s beautiful truths - the things that are actually promised in the Bible that have been most encouraging to me in those devastating moments.  The character of God.  His promises to love and keep his people. His promises to work everything for good. These are the foundations of true hope.  These are the things we can hold on to even in the middle of our Category 5 storms. 

true hope: When Everything Falls Apart

So, what does the Bible actually say about why bad things sometimes happen in our lives?  Lots. Here are three truths we can stand on, supported by the Bible.

1. When something painful happens in your life, it doesn’t mean that it happened because you’ve done something specifically wrong.  We know this because of what Jesus says in verses like John 9:1-5.  We also see examples of this in the lives of people like Joseph and Job- and very clearly in the lives of the disciples.

As he was passing by, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind? ” “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” Jesus answered.“This came about so that God’s works might be displayed in him.  – John 9:1-3 CSB

2. Jesus actually tells us to not be surprised, but to understand that painful things do happen in this life.

Dear friends, don’t be surprised when the fiery ordeal comes among you to test you, as if something unusual were happening to you. 1 Peter 4:12 CSB

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 ESV

3. Our true hope, in the midst of painful things, is not that they will never happen, but that God will not allow anything to happen to His children, that He will not work for their good. 

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28 ESV

If you are going through something painful right now, I hope that you will be encouraged that Jesus cares.  He loves you.  And He is the essence of True Hope.  If you’d like to know as soon as a new article is posted, you can join the email list here. 

Thank you for reading. This article was written by a real person, me 🙂, not AI.

For true hope and joy,

~m